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4 Ways You're Sabotaging Your Custody Case

Sept. 17, 2024

Divorcing is often one of the most challenging processes a person will face. Divorce can be particularly difficult when it involves children and a custody battle. The stresses and challenges of divorce can make it extremely difficult to keep a cool head and act rationally. However, it is essential to remember that being on your best behavior throughout the divorce process is imperative, as the slightest misstep can hurt your chances of achieving a favorable outcome in your child custody case.

The fact is, the court will evaluate your behavior throughout the proceedings when determining custody. So, it is important that you try to maintain a level head during this difficult time, as you may do something in the heat of the moment that could unintentionally affect your custody case. To help give you the best chances during your custody battle, keep reading for a look at four things you should avoid that could sabotage your case.

Badmouthing The Other Parent

During a custody battle, avoid openly badmouthing or criticizing the other parent. While your emotions will likely be heightened during this time, it is crucial to remember that anything you do, say, or post could be used against you in court. In particular, social media can be one of your worst enemies during a custody battle. 

To avoid sabotaging your own case, try not to openly criticize the other parent or try to make them out to be a monster, as this will likely backfire on you. Ranting on the internet, to other people, or (worse) to the judge, will likely reflect worse on your character than on your spouse. 

The best thing to do would be to avoid talking about your spouse or custody case online or with others and stick to the facts when talking to the judge. Your goal in court should be to showcase how you are a good parent rather than trying to make the other parent look bad.

Getting Heated With The Other Parent

Emotions are often high during a divorce, and it can be easy for even a simple conversation with the other parent to devolve into an argument. However, it is critical that you try to keep your cool when you have to converse with the other parent, as yelling, acting threateningly, or resorting to any sort of violence could hurt your custody case. When dealing with the other parent, stay calm and remember that any conversation could be recorded, and yelling at your spouse (particularly in front of your kids) will only reflect on your character and make you look abusive. 

Interfering Contact With the Other Parent

While you may not want to have contact with your ex, you must not prevent your children from visiting their other parent or trying to call them when they spend time with you. These actions are considered parental alienation, which can severely jeopardize your custody case. Courts place a high value on children having relationships with both parents, and they will consider how likely one parent is to provide means of communication with the other parent when determining custody. 

Moving in With Someone New

After separating from your spouse, you may understandably start looking for a new partner. However, it is recommended that you only move in with a significant other after your custody case is settled. Divorce is difficult on children, and the court may interpret your moving in with a new partner as traumatic for the children and may limit your custody accordingly. This is particularly true if your children are uncomfortable staying the night in the same house as your new partner. Thus, it is best to wait until after your custody battle to move in with someone new.   

While going through a divorce can be emotional, it is necessary to try to stay as level-headed as possible if you are dealing with a custody case. Staying calm and keeping your emotions in check will give you the best chance of achieving a favorable outcome.